The value of vanity
This morning I posted (a much prettier word than “blogged”) about becoming vain and self-centered, only partially in jest. I wrote those words as I noticed that the habits I was listing were all about trying to look my best. Bleaching teeth, wearing make-up, (fixing my hair, I forgot to mention that one), night-time facial rituals–all were about my appearance. To defuse this feeling of vanity, I made that comment about becoming vain.
And then Charlotte, my VA (who has been way more than the “assistant” her VA designation suggests!) asked me a question. (We were talking on the phone at the time.)
I don’t remember her exact phrasing (So Charlotte, next time, post it as a comment, and maybe I’ll get it right!) but it was something about me being vain. And then she added something about how we all thought being vain was a bad thing. And it wasn’t.
Wow! Talk about a needed slap upside the head. I had been thinking about all that I was doing as somewhat shallow, trivial, and petty, when it really isn’t that at all. It’s what I need to be doing for me. It’s self care. It helps keep me on track with my diet. So it’s really not shallow, trivial and petty.
So why did I go there? I can come up with a couple of reasons. I’ve been watching shallow and petty “junk” reality TV lately, pumping up my ego thinking I’m above all that. Which I (or my Gremlins) took to mean I was “above” trying to look my best.
And also, I’ve been letting my spiritual connection slide for a while. I’ve not been paying enough attention to my deeper self, and it’s starting to ask for attention. Cuz yeah, there’s been a void there. I guess it’s time I started looking there again.
It’s going to be an interesting year . . .
January 28th, 2008 at 10:25 am
I love that you wrote about vanity, even if it was sort of in jest at first. It’s a topic that’s been on my mind lately, and it was your initial post that led to my asking the question about whether vanity can be a positive trait. I think you hit the nail smack on the head when you equate it with self care. And that’s pretty much the same conclusion I came to. If vanity is about taking good care of yourself, being and looking your best, then it’s positive. It’s only negative when it creates negative results, such as putting other people down as “less” than you, starving yourself, or spending so much time on yourself that you neglect the people you love.
March 15th, 2008 at 1:28 am
To me life is about balance. Sometimes we get it right - with self care - looking after our health, our appearance, etc. Sometimes we put more energy into other things - spiritual development, a hobby, developing a new friendship. My biggest challenge is being gentle with myself if I haven’t got the “mix” exactly right, though I am getting better at self correcting sooner rather than later.